Using Valuable, Precious Energy
Anything wears my health down... perhaps I should rephrase that... Everything wears my health down, even if it is not a physical activity.
It is common sense that physical activity can wear us down. All physical activities easily wear down my health requiring days of rest to recover. What most people do not understand, however, is that even rather sedentary interests wear my health down just as effectively.
For instance, last week I finished up producing my sailing video. That entailed sitting at my computer editing video... taking notes for more edits... calculating synch times... applying those edits... repeating over and over, as necessary... until the video was finished. No physical activity nor strenuous exertion was necessary yet this rather simple, sedentary activity wore me down as though I had been at hard labor and sleep deprived for months. A week later and I am still worn out and exhausted.
This is something that healthy people simply do not understand. To be honest, until I experienced it myself, I too never understood. This is just something that is hard to imagine. It is extremely difficult to accurately put into words so people will understand... especially healthy people... especially those people with boundless energy like I had for the first four decades of my life.
After my health spiraled downward due to Systemic Mastocytosis, I noticed that anything could wear me down. For example, I've been a pianist since I was a young child. I never considered this activity to be physically demanding like exercise or a sport. Unfortunately, most days at this stage of my life, I simply do not have the energy to perform even the simplest of pieces. When I was healthy, I never really understood just how physically demanding playing an instrument truly can be. If I sing while playing the piano, that is even more draining.
Playing the piano is so physically challenging for me now that I rarely will waste what little energy I have on this activity. Just sitting at my computer, editing and producing a video, wore me down to the point where I can do nothing... my bones hurt... my joints hurt... I am tired of being exhausted... and, I'm so exhausted that I can't think straight, nevermind accomplish anything of significance beyond caring for myself. And, even that is exhausting!
I am just beginning to fully understand that just the mere act of thinking uses up valuable, precious energy.
How low does one's "new normal" energy level need to be to fully understand that the mere act of thinking wears one down to an unfathomable level of overwhelming fatigue and pain?
I don't know... but I'm there now...
It is common sense that physical activity can wear us down. All physical activities easily wear down my health requiring days of rest to recover. What most people do not understand, however, is that even rather sedentary interests wear my health down just as effectively.
For instance, last week I finished up producing my sailing video. That entailed sitting at my computer editing video... taking notes for more edits... calculating synch times... applying those edits... repeating over and over, as necessary... until the video was finished. No physical activity nor strenuous exertion was necessary yet this rather simple, sedentary activity wore me down as though I had been at hard labor and sleep deprived for months. A week later and I am still worn out and exhausted.
This is something that healthy people simply do not understand. To be honest, until I experienced it myself, I too never understood. This is just something that is hard to imagine. It is extremely difficult to accurately put into words so people will understand... especially healthy people... especially those people with boundless energy like I had for the first four decades of my life.
After my health spiraled downward due to Systemic Mastocytosis, I noticed that anything could wear me down. For example, I've been a pianist since I was a young child. I never considered this activity to be physically demanding like exercise or a sport. Unfortunately, most days at this stage of my life, I simply do not have the energy to perform even the simplest of pieces. When I was healthy, I never really understood just how physically demanding playing an instrument truly can be. If I sing while playing the piano, that is even more draining.
Playing the piano is so physically challenging for me now that I rarely will waste what little energy I have on this activity. Just sitting at my computer, editing and producing a video, wore me down to the point where I can do nothing... my bones hurt... my joints hurt... I am tired of being exhausted... and, I'm so exhausted that I can't think straight, nevermind accomplish anything of significance beyond caring for myself. And, even that is exhausting!
I am just beginning to fully understand that just the mere act of thinking uses up valuable, precious energy.
How low does one's "new normal" energy level need to be to fully understand that the mere act of thinking wears one down to an unfathomable level of overwhelming fatigue and pain?
I don't know... but I'm there now...
Love you, sweetness!!
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