Scattered Thoughts . . .

Last week, I wrote how Sheila and I have had a rough two months with some relatively 'normal' health stressors for us . What is 'normal' for us is not even close to what is normal for most. Even so, it was a rough couple of months with health nonsense. We had felt as though we were in thick woods for two months and then, suddenly, we emerged into a sunny, colorful meadow... That was a tremendous feeling of relief and very welcomed! Now, less than a week later, we are feeling as though our sunny meadow quickly was overcome by the surrounding forest and now we are a bit lost in a deeper, darker, danker forest.. devoid of sunlight... seeing only tree trunks in front of us blocking our view any farther than we can physically reach with our hands... not knowing which way to go. A few times each day we find ourselves hopeful that we'll find that colorful meadow again but our hopes are consistently and quickly dashed each time.  Suddenly, like during the past two mon

I wrote about this briefly a couple of weeks ago and included a couple of photos but I just put together a more cohesive set of photos today so I'll write about it again. On our first morning at the lake house this year, Sheila and I were sitting in the living room. The file info embedded in each photo shows that it was just after 5am (although, I thought it was two hours later but Sheila disagrees) ... it was dreary... rather dark... but the lake was illuminated by reflecting the brighter sky.  We were sitting there having some morning coffee... Sheila comfortable on the couch while I sat at my desk beside the couch. My desk overlooks the lake and I noticed something floating in the water directly out in front of our house but halfway across the lake. This is a good distance and it is very unusual to see debris in the lake so it caught my eye immediately. I pointed and asked Sheila, "what is that in the water?" At first, I thought it was just a big log floating wit

Whenever my health fails with mast cell issues, a whole slew of extra medications and emergency medications are needed on top of the immense assortment of everyday medications I must consume daily in order to stay here among the living. These emergency medications, however, bring on a grogginess and foggy state which is difficult to effectively and accurately describe. I feel like I am walking around in a different dimension than the rest of the population on our tiny rock in our vast, ever-expanding universe. I feel like this dimension is cold, damp, rather dark... like an underground tunnel... except at this stage of recovery, there is no brilliant light shining at the end of this tunnel... just shadows... silence... almost like a vacuum void of all things we understand as life. As can be expected, my brain  is significantly impacted  with an imposed suppression of cognitive ability due to the grogginess brought on by these drugs (albeit life-saving drugs, for me). My mind bou